Aïcha

A Greek Tragedy (?) en Français

brought to you by:
Some French Students at UCLA

Written and directed by:
Joseph

The cast:

Aïcha    . . . . . . . .    Brigit
Mohammed, husband to Aïcha    . . . . . . . .    Bennett
Monique, sister to Aïcha    . . . . . . . .    Nathan
Safwan ibn al-Muattal    . . . . . . . .    Alexander
Chorus/Citizens/Guards    . . . . . . . .    Elaine
                                   . . . . . . . .    Fontaine
                               . . . . . . . .   Allison
                              . . . . . . . .    Anne
                                  . . . . . . . .    Jennifer
                            . . . . . . . .    Nha
                                  . . . . . . . .    Nathan
                                  . . . . . . . .    Joseph
                                   . . . . . . . .    Brendan

 

 

Scene I

(Enter AÏCHA, MOHAMMED, MONIQUE. MONIQUE stands off to the side, swaying her hips while examining herself in the mirror.)

MOHAMMED (angry): Qu'est-ce qui s'est passé dans le désert?
(What happened in the desert?)

AÏCHA: Rien s'est passé. Où étais-TU?
(Nothing happened. Where were YOU?)

MOHAMMED: J'ai travaillé.
(I worked.)

AÏCHA: Tu travaille toujours. Est-ce que tu ne m'aimes pas?
(You are always working. Do you not love me?)

MOHAMMED: Tu es seulement une femme parmi beaucoup.
(You are only one woman out of many.)

(CHORUS boos. MOHAMMED exits.)

(AÏCHA taps the oblivious MONIQUE on the shoulder.)

AÏCHA: Monique!

MONIQUE: Ooooooouuuuuuuuuuuiiiiiiii? (CHORUS whistles and cat-calls. MONIQUE blows kisses to the audience.)

AÏCHA: Je me divorce avec Mohammed. Ce n'est pas juste qu'il fait.
(I am divorcing Mohammed. What he does is not right.)

MONIQUE: Aïcha, tu es folle.
(You are crazy.)

AÏCHA: Je ne peux pas supporter qu'il me trait comme de la propriété.
(I cannot stand the fact that he treats me like his porperty.)

MONIQUE: Mais Aïcha ... tu es folle!

AÏCHA: Je suis un modèle pour les peuples. Peu importe.
(I am a model for the people. Little matters.)

MONIQUE (finally sets down her mirror, is hysterical): Mais Aïcha ... TU ES FOLLE!

(AÏCHA sighs and comforts MONIQUE, leads her off-stage to a chair.)

 

Scene 2

(Enter MOHAMMED and AÏCHA.)

AÏCHA: Mohammed. Je ne me justifie devant personne (CHORUS: Right on!). TU N'ES PAS DIEU!
(Mohammed. I am not justifying myself in front of anyone. YOU ARE NOT GOD!)

MOHAMMED (fuming): Je dois travailler!
(I have to work!)

(MOHAMMED huffs, exits STAGE RIGHT. Except STAGE RIGHT is a wall and he slams into it. CHORUS commences moaning and wailing and flailing arms about.)

CHORUS: Mohammed! Est-ce que tes aïeux aussi étaient misogyniste?
(Mohammed! Were your ancestors also misogynists?)

(CHORUS wails excitedly.)

CHORUS: Mohammed! Combien de femmes as-tu connu?
(Mohammed! How many women have you known?)

CONFUSED CHORUS MEMBER: PRAISE THE LORD!

(CHORUS stops and gapes.)

CONFUSED CHORUS MEMBER: Ooops.

CHORUS: Et tes descendants, Mohammed? Seront-ils aussi hypocrites? Et leurs fils, et leurs fils, et leurs fils, et leurs fils ...
(And your descendants, Mohammed? Will they also be hypocrites? And their sons, and their sons, and their sons, and their sons ... )

(CHORUS moans.)

CHORUS (not as loudly): Mais il était toujours bon avec nous.
(But he was always good to us.)  

 

Scene 3

(MOHAMMED is "working." Enter SAFWAN.)

SAFWAN: Je suis arrivé!
(I have arrived!)

(CHORUS cheers.)

MOHAMMED: Et bien?
(Well?)

SAFWAN: Je suis l'homme qui a sauvé Aïcha dans le désert.
(I am the man who saved Aïcha in the desert.)

MOHAMMED (takes out knife and sharpens it): Vraiiiiiiment.
(Reeeeaally.)

SAFWAN (playing to the crowd): Je ne pourrais jamais accepter de l'argent. Je l'a fait parce que c'était la seule chose philanthropique à faire.
(I could never accept money. I did it because it was the only philanthropic thing to do.)

MOHAMMED: Tu seras payé ... avec TA MORT. MAINTENANT, GARDES!
(You will be paid ... with YOUR DEATH. NOW, GUARDS!)

(CHORUS rushes up in a frenzy, hoists up SAFWAN and throws him out the door. They wipe their hands and sit down demurely.)  

 

Scene 4

(Enter MOHAMMED and AÏCHA. Cue melodramatic music.)

AÏCHA: Est-ce que tu es fier de toi-même?
(Are you proud of yourself?)

MOHAMMED: Bien sûr.
(Of course.)

AÏCHA: Pourquoi est-ce que tu l'as fait?
(Why did you do it?)

MOHAMMED: Parce que je te ... je dois FAIRE DE LA JUSTICE!
(Because I love .. because I must UPHOLD JUSTICE!)

AÏCHA: Et la justice pour moi?
(And the justice for me?)

MOHAMMED: Toi? De toi ... J'ai parlé avec Dieu (CHORUS snickers). Et il m'a dit que tu es innocente.
(You? Of you ... I talked with God. And he told me that you are innocent.)

(They embrace. Cue modern dance music and the chorus joins the cast in dancing on stage.)

 

 

THE END!